Monday, December 22, 2008

Trust After an Affair - Can it Be Regained?

Trust is the strongest bond a relationship can have and without it most marriages cannot survive and fall apart like a house of cards. Trust after an affair therefore is something that is missing and must be regained if there is any hope for your relationship to continue without divorce or further problems and infidelity.

With this in mind how can trust be regained in a relationship tainted by a marital affair?

The answer is not a simple, or an easy one but many people who have followed the right path have managed to create a marriage that is stronger and better than it was before because regaining the trust means rebuilding your relationship based on the understanding of the affair and the problems in your marriage before it.

This means open and honest communication between you and your cheating spouse which is what many people feel they cannot do because of a few issues:

  • Fear - Fear of knowing the problems, fear it may be your own fault somehow, fear of knowing details that will make you upset.
  • Anger - You cannot have a conversation with your partner about the subject because you get angry and cannot talk properly due to outbursts or such a negative response to every answer that it does not seem productive.
  • Do not WANT to listen - Many people do not want to listen to their partner about the affair and the reasons behind it because they do not want to give their partner any chance to make excuses and would rather BE angry and use the affair as some sort of weapon to hold against them. This is a poisonous thing that leads to MORE affairs and often divorce and misery.

If you can find a way through these issues and truly understand everything about the affair in an attempt to revive your relationship and deal with the problems that led to your partner straying (which is their fault NOT yours) then you can be more trusting of them because the reasons that breed the mentality for infidelity will be gone and you AND your partner will have the understanding needed to see why you want to be with each other exclusively because your marriage becomes not just a binding contract to faithfulness but something you both WANT to be in rather than a duty to be upheld!

So if you want more information on surviving adultery in your marriage click below to find guides that can give you a roadmap to recovery that will help you get past the anger and hurt and rebuild trust and love once again.

http://www.loveiscomplicated.info/affairs-cheating/dealing-with-an-affair-e-book-reviews/

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