Recovering From an Affair Does Not Have to be Difficult

Recovering from an affair can seem like the hardest thing in the world as the pain, anger and hurt seem to take up residence in your heart and refuses to move no matter what you try. This does not need to be the case however as we all have the choice to be happy and we all have the choice to change ourselves and bring others along with this change which can mend even the rockiest marriage.

The choice is a very important aspect of healing. It is not as easy as just waking up one day and choosing to put it all behind you as some people might try to do and end up lying to themselves but instead it is the choice to stop grieving over what has happened and to stop grieving over the loss of the marriage you once had and instead turn your sights to the future.

This means that the anger and hurt must be dealt with so that you can purge the negativity from yourself in order to make that choice with a clear purpose and without falling again to depression and anger. How to do this is the hard part for many people because it involves an honest and in depth discussion about the affair and all that it entails.

The anxiety and fear about doing this can make some people feel physically ill as we shy away from hearing about details of our loved ones in the embrace of another but that is not the point of it. The reason to discuss the affair is to uncover the real reasons why they did it beyond simple lust because most affairs happen because one partner is not getting something they want out of their marriage and end up looking for an emotional connection elsewhere.

This does NOT mean it was your fault before you think of it as such! THEY made the decision to cheat not you. THEY chose to abandon their vows not you.

What it does mean is that if you know where your marriage may have left your partner unfulfilled of wanting you can address that issue taking consideration that it was serious enough to drive them to an affair and work to fix those problems. It also means you can air your own feelings of anger and hurt in a civilized fashion with both of you in a discussion not an argument and only through this cathartic and informative discussion will you be recovering from an affair enough to purge the negativity to be able to make that choice … the choice to move in and create something new.

For more expert help on surviving an affair click below to get the help you need to create a happier life.

http://www.loveiscomplicated.info/affairs-cheating/

Men, Divorce, Depression & Coping With It All

Whenever I see an article about divorce, or watch a news or current affair report about life of divorcees it always seems to focus on the woman’s plight and not any problems of men. Divorce & depression are partners for men after a marriage fails and recent reports have suggested that men take divorce a lot harder than women for a number of reasons.

These reasons are usually linked with women’s ability to develop social networks that allow them to get the support, advice and help they need while men often do not have these things and try to be stoic in the face of a massively changed life with emotional turmoil building inside them. Marriage problems and the divorce often lead to one prominent emotional issue which is depression.

While there are enormous numbers of books written on depression you can find some good practical advice you can use straight away include:

• Breaking down your problems into smaller pieces - Sometimes the divorce and problems after the event all pile up and can become unbearable making it depressing and overwhelming. Since there is no way back and no way out though you must start sorting your issues into smaller manageable chunks and just work at one at a time or the task may seem to be too much.
• Do not focus on the negatives - This is probably the hardest thing to do when you are depressed and it is impossible to stop thinking about negative things. However to lessen the problems you must find good things and focus on them even if they seem too small to make a difference against the negatives. The trick is though it is like breaking your problems into smaller chunks … after a while you have collected enough good positive feelings, thoughts and emotions that they can start to make an impact … never let go of the good things and actions you take!
• Have a goal - Men are very good at setting goals to achieve and we are biologically built to solve problems. Sometimes we do this in the most inappropriate way mind you but if we have the right tools we can build anything! With this in mind even if depression does strike you having something to do is important, it could be a life goal, an emotional goal or even a physical goal it does not matter. Achieving something makes men feel good at helps again depression and negative thinking.

For more advice by a man who has been through a messy divorce, depression and a whole host of other problems and has built a roadmap to recovery for men after divorce click below to find out more.

http://www.loveiscomplicated.info/divorce/

Fix Your Sexless Marriage - Book Review

The frustration, shame and hurt that comes from a marriage that is lacking in physical intimacy can do more than hurt your self-esteem; it can bring on depression, effects the lives of your children if you have any and according to recent studies and statistics it can be a major part in decisions about divorce too.

This can be quite a dire state of affairs for a married couple but if it was so easy to fix surely you would have done it by now right? The problem is it is NOT easy to fix for many reasons such as:

• Communication Difficulties
• Resentment
• Fear
• Self Blame
• … and more.

This is where you need help, this is where you need ammunition to fight this rut in your marriage and bring it back on track to be happier, healthier and full of wonderful, hot, passionate sexy SEX!

Enter “Fix Your Sexless Marriage” or “Get him/her in the mood” as it is also called written by Kate Dixon.

This e-book could be your key to unlocking the door to a more passionate marriage not because it will give you the information to directly turn your man or woman into lusty spouses but because it will change the way you live, think and feel about YOURSELF first and foremost which is the psychological secret to turning around a sexless marriage. Sounds too good to be true? Read on to see why it works …

At first we were skeptical of this e-book as you might well be too and acquired a copy of it which then made us realize there wee TWO guides, one specifically for men and one specifically for women. This piqued my interest and prompted me to delve in further to the guides.

Again I was not overly impressed to start with, the introduction and first section seemed like a little too much common sense and did not add much more than you would find anywhere else but this quickly changed the further I read.

While a lot of it was common sense Kate Dixon had the foresight to set the scene first and gently ease the reader into the meatier chunks of the guide which may well become overwhelming and perhaps even insulting to those not prepared to hear the solid gold advice she dispenses later in the book.

With a great mix of very practical measures you can take which seamlessly tie in with the underlying psychological problems that are the root cause of a sexless relationship this guides is not only great for rekindling the sex drive of your partner but it will give you an understanding of how your partner actually thinks from their perspective and how, by adjusting your own actions, beliefs and ideas for the betterment of your own physical and mental health … you will indirectly light a fire in their lovemaking furnace and get theirs and your libido pumping again.

For great information in a no-nonsense, practical and easy to read style and having a seperate guide both men and women Kate Dixon’s guide to fixing your sexless marriage has earned our highest score. Our only warning is the first few chapters are a little on the slow and common sense side but are a good setup for the rest which can have you changing your marriage sex life for the better even if you are fearful, have communication problems with your spouse or feel too hurt to overcome this.

Not only that it comes with a 100% money back guarantee which means you have nothing to risk but the chance to rekindle your sex life!

Click here for more information on “Fix your sexless marriage”

Healing After the Affair - 3 Tips to Overcome Infidelity in a Relationship

Affairs can tear the fabric of a relationship wide open and destroy the bond of trust that is the strongest force for keeping people together. Healing after the affair therefore is vital to mend broken trust and much to the surprise of many couples can reforge their marriage into something much stronger than before the affair.

How can surviving an affair lead to a better marriage? These 3 tips may explain the process…

1. Communication

Many marriage counselor have proven that couples who do not talk about the affair are statistically worse off that those who do. While it may seem like the hardest thing in the world to talk about when you are so hurt and angry the only way to move forward is to communicate your problems and listen to their reasons for their terrible choice. To be able to do this though you need to be able to control your anger and bitterness or such conversations will be negative or explosive and nothing will be learned.

2. Understanding

Through communication of the marital affair you can gain an understanding of the reasons behind it. This does not excuse their actions at all but without understanding these things you are not truly able to talk about the right things and maybe angry and hurt at things that you should not be. Understanding also comes in the form of knowing what was wrong with your relationship before the affair that might have led them to an affair which sometimes means you have to look at your own actions as well … again not an excuse for their actions, they made the choice but if you want to regain trust and heal your relationship after an affair you must be honest with yourself.

3. Change

Once you have an understanding of the affair and the relationship problems that might have been simmering before it you can actually start to take action, forgiveness can take time but building a better relationship from this event is the best thing you can do from a bad situation and healing after an affair will follow from this!

Obviously there is a lot more to healing from an affair so for more help click below to find guides written by expert marriage councilors that can offer you a roadmap to recovery allowing you to get past the hurt and bring love and happiness back to your life.

http://www.loveiscomplicated.info/affairs-cheating/

Is Your Marriage Becoming Sexless? Advice For Women Facing a Sexless Marriage

Marriage without the intimacy and release of sex becomes a dull and fragile thing which can destroy a good marriage by sucking the joy and closeness out of what should be an amazing experience in love; physically, spiritually and mentally. If all these great things are enabled by making love then why is your marriage becoming sexless? There are a few conclusions women will come to when trying to define this problem but unfortunately most of them are wrong!

Many women take the path of self loathing believing that their husband does not find them attractive anymore; perhaps they think they have put on weight or do not have time to dress up anymore or they think that whatever fire of passion that was there has gone out because they are too familiar or that life is hard. In any case the wife blames herself which is terrible for mental health and confidence which becomes another issue. Why this is so wrong is that men appreciate confidence in their women just as women like confidence in men, a wife who wallows in self pity because she feels unattractive becomes the thing she does not want to be psychologically and eventually physically driving home a sexless marriage complex that infects both partners

The opposite spectrum are women who blame their man, perhaps they suspect him of having affairs or that he has become impotent and lost his sex drive. This can lead to resentment and sometimes to the wife having affairs as revenge or as a release which only makes matters much worse in a sexless marriage!

So what is the REAL reason your marriage is becoming sexless?

This is a complex issue but what many marriage counselors and therapists have found over the years is that men who stop having sex with their wives are rarely having affairs and nearly always still love their partner very much. What does this mean? It means the problem is more often than not the mans and often it is psychological.

Do you fear your marriage is headed for a break up over a lack of sex?
If so, you need to know you CAN turn this around!
Click below to find out how you can get a passionate and happy marriage and put an end to cold bedsheets and lonely nights
http://www.loveiscomplicated.info/sex/sexless-marriages

Hopeful Solutions for Your Sexless Marriage - Book Review

Sex and intimacy can be a very difficult subject to talk about with your spouse at times which can seem strange when a couple is suppose to be so close to each other that these subjects should be easy to converse about. The reality is that it is difficult and can make you anxious and can often cause arguments and fights when a lack of intimacy causes problems.

‘Hopeful Solutions for Your Sexless Marriage’ is a downloadable guide that can help you find a way to overcome these difficulties and bring intimacy and sex back to a relationship gone cold. Dr Andrew Atwood is the author of this e-book and has some serious credentials behind him as a marriage and family therapist & social worker for over 30 years.

So what is it about this guide that can actually help a marriage or relationships struggling with a lack of sex?

Firstly, Dr Atwood has compiled a mammoth amount of information in his guide with 50 chapters in total covering an amazing variety of situations, solutions and advice that can apply to your particular situation as everyone’s problems are different.

Secondly, the book is insightful on a level that goes well beyond the bedroom and really shows that these problems are not a result of the first thing that we think of … sexuality. Covering the psychology, differences between men and women, family politics, power struggles, anxiety and much more along with the more physical aspects of a sexless marriage.

Thirdly, Dr Atwood creates a process for a couple to follow or even one dissatisfied partner. Not quite step-by-step but a good framework to make communication easier and a map to go forward to the next step to bringing back the intimacy.

Now while there are a lot of good points there are a few niggles and issues that can be found.

The large amount of information can sometimes be confusing and overwhelming if you approach it in the wrong way. Dr Atwood has constructed the book to be like a journey and you are benefited if you follow the book the way he intended but if you skip around it tends to become a mess. This is not a massive problem but you will not be able to just skip to the chapter that you want and find a solution; it is constructed as a journey not a trouble shooting guide.

Also the style of writing can be a tad silly which he does even admit on his website. He overuses the ‘car journey’ metaphor a bit too much which can be tiresome but it is forgivable in the context of his philosophy and his attempt to make the difficult easier to talk about.

So overall ‘Hopeful Solutions for Your Sexless Marriage’ is a worth downloading for those in this frustrating situation. It can be used by anyone but is best for couples seeking an answer together or a relationship where both partners are at least somewhat willing to engage in the journey with their spouse more than those who are trying to somehow cause a change without involving their partner in their schemes.

Click here for more information about ‘Hopeful Solutions for Your Sexless Marriage’